12 Mar Explore Lockdown Diaries – Nick and Motty
In our latest Lockdown Diaries blog series, Explore volunteer couple Nick and Motty share their pandemic story with us, and reflect on how their relationship has strengthened during this unprecedented time.
Someone else’s habits are one of the reasons we can love them so much. Maybe it is their turn of phrase, the way they smile or the way they always drink the milk straight from the carton. Always… that’s the habit.
Nick and Motty have found time spent together during the pandemic has taught them to appreciate everything about each other, even habits. As Motty says: “We learnt to give each other allowances and to be more tolerant of each other’s habits that we don’t like”.
“It has been unusual spending so much time together because Nick is working from home and I am not working currently having recently moved”. The couple’s two children are fairly self-sufficient now they are older and the couple has not had to experience the pressures of homeschooling and entertaining their children like other parents with younger children. “We have just each other almost all the time”.
The husband-and-wife team have known each other for 30 years. Whilst they have needed to make allowances and adjustments to being around each other all the time, they talk to us about how the pandemic has actually been a great opportunity to make time to invest in their relationship together.
“We have had to adjust to a different way of being together”, says Motty. “We walk more and watch films together”. They have also been spending time studying books as a couple.
To find that time for themselves, they’ve done this in two ways says Nick: “Walks and reading have been great personal time but talking with friends individually has been great for both of us too”.
Perhaps, as a sign of their tolerance and appreciation for each other, they don’t reveal any bad habits. It’s a good habit to have, along with making allowances. With so much time together, Nick and Motty have created the right spaces to enjoy their relationship, finding time for their own spaces and respecting that they might not be perfect.
And, even after 30 years together, they still need to check up on each other. Motty says “We make time to talk about how each of us is doing”. To make that authentic, “be willing and flexible to make adjustments for each other.”
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